One day, a mole father popped out of their burrow and said, "I smell honey". Then, the mother said "I smell honey, too!"
The baby could not get out to smell the honey so, he said: "I cant smell honey, but I can smell Molasses!"
Don't get it? Mole-asses. What about know??
A teenager went to an expensive jewelry store. He wanted to buy a Valentine gift for his girlfriend. He picked out the most expensive bracelet there. The jeweler said to the teen, "You must really love your girlfriend! Would you like to have her name engraved on it?"
Then the boy replied, "Don't engrave her name on it. Instead, engrave 'to my one and only love" on it."
"Why is that?" asked the jeweler.
"Well, if we ever break up, I can reuse it again."
A cowboy and a biker are on death row, and are to be executed on the same day. The day comes, and they are brought to the gas chamber. The warden asks the cowboy if he has a last request, to which the cowboy replies, "Ah shore do, wardn. Ah'd be mighty grateful if'n yoo'd play 'Achy Breaky Heart' fur me bahfore ah hafta go."
"Sure enough, cowboy, we can do that," says the warden. He turns to the biker, "And you, biker, what's your last request?"
"That you kill me first."
Q: What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
A: The teacher says
"Get that gum out of your mouth",
where as the train says
"Chew, Chew ".